In the article
“How to be a Woman” by Caitlin Moran, she goes in to a very detailed
description about society’s view and stereotype on woman. The first question interviewers
and reporters always seem to ask is “When are you going to have children?” whether
its in the beginning or the end that questions always pops up. But she says the
truth is that they aren’t at all actually curious in whether you’re going to
have children or not but in fact when are you going to “fuck it all up” by
having kids? When are you going to throw away your life and ambition just because
you have a child? However males never get asked this question, but why is that?
She suggest that men can pretty much carry on and continue their life as normal
even though they had a baby but woman its all over for them apparently. With
out having children you serve no purpose and people are just going to judge you
for not having a child because “women love babies”. Moran even gives examples
of her own pregnancy, she said “I would have happily shot the worlds last panda
in the face if it made the baby cry for 60 seconds less” that’s a big
statement! Maybe having babies isn’t its all cracked up to be? She lived off of
ready meals, stopped recycling, kitchen was always a mess, and she even said if
her own mother had died she probably wouldn’t have even noticed. Moran does adequately support her claims with
evidence. She uses a lot of examples from her own personal life such as when
she has been interviewed or her friends. She goes on to explain why the lessons
taught from motherhood can be taught elsewhere and how having children isn’t really
all that necessary because they’re are “plenty of babies being born “and not
everyone needs to be having children because they feel pressured. Even though
Moran hasn’t said anything actually positive about having children I don’t think
that that was her point at all. I believe she’s saying that there is more to
woman than just having children. Having babies isn’t all woman are good for!
When you state that you feel Moran is telling her readers that men do not "fuck up" their lives by having kids, I feel she meant something different. While yes, she is stating that men do not get impacted anywhere near as severely as women do when having kids, later in the article she goes on to state that the world loses TWO useful people when a baby is born, because men too are affected by pregnancy and fatherhood. By stating this, she is implying to her readers that the man is impacted as well and also has to make some form of commitment and sacrifice for the child, which takes away a great deal of time from his life. Even if a man chooses not to be in the life of his child, impregnating a woman will still result in him paying some form of child support for the baby, which will impact his life for at least 18 years, and will take a great deal of money and time spent working from his life. Also, I feel her article isn’t only negative towards women having babies. She does state that women do not need to have children in order to live a fulfilling life, which I agree with, but the emphasis is that she says women do not exactly need to. By stating that women don’t necessarily “need to” sounds to me like she is still for the idea of women having kids if it feels right for them. Yes, it is not necessary for women to have babies, but it would still be a wonderful thing, just not something that is exactly “needed” like society leads women to feel.
ReplyDeleteI can see how some woman can take being asked when are they going to have children offensive, just because woman have the ability to produce kids and that’s how we are made doesn’t necessarily mean that we should have to have children as Caitlin Moran said mentioned. However I personally feel that as women if we have the ability to do something so beautiful and admirable we should do it or at least try. I know of plenty of people who are not physically able to bear children. Those people desperately wish they could at least just one child no matter what condition they may be born with. Many women really don’t want to even try to have kids for whatever reason. In some cases those women may have legitimate reasons, like they are naturally selfish and don’t want to take away from their child. Still some woman don’t want to have kids just because don’t want to ruin their bodies, or their spouses don’t want any kids. I feel that if a woman does not want any kids they should at least give their eggs away for someone who might want to use them and get use out the things they selfishly would rather not use anymore. I completely understand a woman not wanting to have kids that’s their decision and I respect it. Having kids it’s a huge task to take on especially for a person who’s selfish and really doesn’t want it. As for me though I want to have kids even though I’m not interested in marriage
ReplyDeleteIn this piece you summarize her argument about choices to sound like women giving birth is entirely a choice left up to women, and although the anatomical part of this is true I feel as if the emotional part is not. Also putting the argument into this perspective leaves the other option that summarizes men into the “not caring” or “whatever attitude she talks about. However it is true that many men feel that when a relationship grows into a marriage or into deep love that the next, and one of the most important steps, is to have children and continue the lineage of the family. For a man having a child comes with equally as much responsibility because while the mother tends to the child’s care and wellbeing by “shutting out society” as the author writes I am sure the husband had to work harder or longer than he normally was to provide for not only his wife but also the child that is added. He too is burdened to at least 18 years of burden and I feel as if the author makes it sound like if she decides not too her husband or significant other better deal with it and keep his mouth shut; but having a child could be something he wants more than her. For a man to not have any sons or daughters to watch grow is a painful thing to his pride because society for the most part has always assumed patriarchs the dominant ones and if the man cant even convince his wife to reproduce what does that say about his masculinity. And the truth behind it all is yes a women’s biological clock is ticking whereas a man’s never stops. So to ask men is assuming there is a time limit, which there is not but when someone asks a woman it can be seen as a reminder that there is more to life than just becoming successful in a career, not to be belittling or sexist but rather as a general reminder of the risk you take by waiting.
ReplyDeleteThe article is about the author of this article negatively portrays throughout the whole article the choice to reproduce. Her ultimate reasoning behind the idea that the idea to have children is not great, is that women cannot reach their full potential and live up to their wildest dreams with babies in the picture. This is not at all true. Take into consideration famous actresses. These beautiful people have all obviously lived up to their dreams, and all have pretty much reproduced. I mean what more can you possible accomplish, then being someone who is famous? Another example I have, is my own mother. She had me at an extremely young age of twenty. At the time she was limited to fulfilling her childhood dreams. Now that I am officially grown up and in college, she is living her life to the maximum capacity. Since she had me, her life goal was to become the highest level at her job at chase. Just because I was born, that dream did not change. That goal never went away. She is three levels from the highest possible level at Chase. What I am trying to get at, is that having children absolutely does not mean you can not live life to the fullest potential. Maybe wait until you are older to reproduce, so it is possible to live life and fulfill goals at a younger age. Even if a woman were to have children young, it only takes about twenty years for a child to become an adult. Finish your goals and dreams once your children have grown up. It is never too late!
ReplyDeleteI do agree with you that having babies is not all a women is good for, but I do not believe that was Moran's main point. I believe that Moran's point of the article was to inform women that it is okay to not have babies and they should not feel pressured to have them. Moran explains that society puts pressure on women by always asking "When are you going to have babies?". But that is just a subtle way of asking, "When are you going to "put all your creativity and power on hold to tend to the helpless, minute by minute needs of your newly born?" Having babies is a big commitment; it is an eighteen year + job. Its time consuming, expensive, and exhausting to take care of children. Not all women are up for that and they should not be criticized it. Of course having children teaches you many lessons, but you can still learn them elsewhere. Women are usually at their peak in their fertile years. So why choose to stop it all for something you may not want to do? Society casts a negative light on women who do not want to reproduce as if giving birth is a rite of passage to being a wise respected elder. But Moran explains that "while motherhood is an incredible vocation, it has no more inherent worth than a childless women simply being who she is, to her utmost of her capabilities". Not having children does not make a women any less of a person.
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